Project Whimsy #6: Doctor Janitor!

If you’re worried that your children will grow up to be losers, go ahead and name them “Doctor” or “Astronaut” or “Lawyer”. That way, no matter…

Remember your spirit – always.

I will attempt to answer the age-old riddle: what do you do if you really want to win a South Park Kenny doll from a claw…

In 1997, I became obsessed with truck drivers blowing their horns whenever I would make a fist pumping action. The problem is, as I got older…

A few years ago, I wrote an important article that was universally hailed by Van Halen fans as the definitive, all-time top 10 list of their…

Rent a van and kidnap a random woman off the street. Tie her up in your basement and tell her all the terrible ways you’re going…

Back in 2010, before I suddenly decided that I wanted to become an actor my whole life, I got my dream job: Director of Marketing at…

I haven’t been there, but if there is one place I hate, it’s Europe. Why so judgmental, you might say? Let’s review: People in France are rude…

So my friend Amy* gets a job hawking dresses for Old Navy, she stars as a big shot attorney at a law firm: Now she’s on…

As a self-appointed scholar of all things related to the television show, South Park, I have given much thought to this matter. Rather than make up…

Kidnap a baby and inject him with butterfly DNA, in the hopes that he will grow wings and be able to fly. It’s time to take the…