Dr. Penis Puncher, M.D.
Now that my lawsuit is over, I can finally tell you my story: In the fall of 2017, I was experiencing numbness ‘down there’ and so…
I’m a pilot!
Back in the ‘olden days’ of plane travel, I got to sit in the pilot’s seat of the 747 taking my family to Disney World and…
No Soup For New Cars.
NOTE: This is an entry from my twitter page that I have condesnsed here for increased ease of readability. ATTN: BMW USA, I recently tried to…
Don’t Pinch Me!
I fucked up. Big time. Right now, I am writing this blog on my iPhone. I am huddled under my desk trying to get a hold…
Attack of the Clones®
“Look at this shit!” Frank demanded, holding out a tissue containing several curly black hairs, which he attempted to force upon the nearest three or four…
Welcome to Garbage Town!
“It’s pretty simple,” I told him, “I am riding around in a limo. I am eating fast food. When I am done, I have to throw…
Life on the bottom
Dr. Vlasic held his head in his hands, sobbing. Dr. Juneau half-heartedly put her hand on his shoulder. While the others rolled their eyes or looked…
What happened to Uncle Larry?
When they were kids, my dad’s rivalry with his brother Larry was pretty intense. My grandparents basically made them compete for their love. This carried over…
Small town folk are stupid and worse than us.
As a resident of the big city, I feel it is my right to look down upon the closely-held core beliefs of small town folk. If…
Tips for Tips!
No, this isn’t another one of my pro-adult circumcision diatribes, rather it is a more straightforward advice column about the awkward subject of tipping. Servers live off…
Eric Filipkowski 